Seriously! Do they even know how much sleep we lose?
Pediatrician: Now as far as screen time, no more than an hour and a half…— TwinzerDad (@TwinzerDad) March 6, 2019
Me: No worries Doc, there’s no way we’d ever let them go more than hour and a half without watching TV.
Pediatrician: ….#Dadlife #parenting
Can we all stop acting like “screen time” is a dirty word? I’m pretty sure it has saved my life a time or two.
They start torturing us early, don’t they?
Even the loveliest children suddenly turn into tiny, whining little tortoises when it is PJ time.
Parenting is 50% figuring out how to do things with one hand.
Stop pretending you never do this…
Kiddo: What’s a beer bong?— Kristin Boo-tus, 2020 edition 😱😷🎃 (@kristinbartus) March 2, 2019
Me: (Gives brief, technical explanation.)
Kiddo: That sounds fun. I want to do that in college.
Me: It’s good to have goals.#parentingfail
Dream big, kiddo! Sky is the limit!
In other news…— S.C. Braudrick Author (@BraudrickC) March 2, 2019
my oldest child…comes home to tell me on Friday that her drama class is doing a lipsync battle and they get to pick their songs…
Me: that’s great! What did you pick?
12 year old daughter: Fat Bottomed Girls
Well, in all fairness, they do make the rocking world go ‘round…
Did you see any funny tweets this week? Please share because if we don’t laugh, we will break down sobbing. Here’s to another week of keeping them alive without (completely) losing your mind!